Blooming Where I'm Planted

Rain Rain Go Away

2009-07-02T14:59:00.002-04:00

Two weeks of rain
in June
leaves us
cranky

soggy

waiting to be wrung out
and hung to dry
on the warm clotheslines of July

Attack of the Zombies

2009-05-26T17:35:00.002-04:00

I think I finally woke up for real at about 1:00 this afternoon. Everything before that point in the day is the consistency of oatmeal.

My kiddos were so lucky to have me today.

So Excited

2009-05-25T12:37:00.002-04:00

Can. Not. Wait.

Schizophrenic

2009-05-25T12:26:00.002-04:00

Today I used an Amazon gift certificate that has been sitting around since my birthday. (Sidenote: I should be commended for this. Amazon gift cards usually have the shelf-life of about a week around here.) The contents of the order are as follows:

1. Jim Brickman's new solo piano CD, Unspoken.
2. Three Cups of Tea: One Man's Mission to Promote Peace...One School at a Time by Greg Mortenson
3. Vision in White by Nora Roberts
4. What Really Matters for Struggling Readers by Richard Allington
5. I Love My New Toy (An Elephant and Piggie Book) by Mo Willems

It's no wonder my Amazon home page recommendations look like they're meant for a schizophrenic. If Amazon ever figured out that these books are all meant for one person, they'd send the men in white coats after me.

More adventures...

2009-04-20T15:33:00.003-04:00

The latest from my foray into the online dating world...

One of the nice gentlemen who popped up on my list of potential suitors described himself as looking for a "sole mate". I was unsure whether to have him introduce his left foot to his right or to applaud his commitment to monogamy.

And yes, I'm well aware that I am a grammar snob.

Wicked funny

2009-04-05T13:58:00.004-04:00

At the risk of having my cool twenty-something card revoked (yeah, like that hasn't already happened), I'm going to publicly admit to loving Mamma Mia. Yes, I know all of the words. I love Pierce Brosnan, in all his hotness, trying so very hard to sing and failing miserably. It makes me laugh right out loud every time he sings. And that wall scene in the middle of "SOS"...kills me. Every time.

I think every musical should be required to have a wall scene.

Sing it, Pierce.

Haiku is for amateurs

2009-03-29T12:45:00.003-04:00

Should
be
doing
lesson plans,
but geeky poems
are so much more entertaining.

My modest attempt at a Fib, a 6-line, 20 syllable poem based on the Fibonacci sequence...it's math and poetry all in one!

(1) As
(1) a
(2) former
(3) champion
(5) Mathlete, I think these
(8) suckers are incredibly fun.

(13) From this you can conclude that I have no social life.

Julia's Back

2009-03-22T19:11:00.005-04:00

As the kitchen gods have had time to get over the hysterical laughing that my upside-down roast chicken no doubt incurred, I thought I'd try out something new today: beef stew and beer bread. Surprisingly good things came of this endeavor. First, I mostly made up the beef stew recipe from bits and pieces of recipes I had and a liberal dose of my mother's soup making theory, "throw whatever you have into it until it looks good." The result was not brilliant, but it at least passed for beef stew.
The crowning achievement came with my beer bread. This recipe doesn't exactly get difficulty points from the judges, but it's really pretty good! And I didn't screw it up! I served it with a little homemade honey butter, which was perfect. I ate three whole pieces...I don't think this will last too long!
Mmmmmm...

Book Brahmin

2009-03-20T20:22:00.004-04:00

I'm a nerd. I love book questions! These were inspired by Susan Wiggs' answers at Shelf Awareness

On your nightstand now:
Two remotes, because one doesn't work properly, a Lenten daily meditation thing that I haven't opened in 2 weeks, Penny Kittle's The Greatest Catch: A Life in Teaching, and two different alarms that I managed to shut off in my sleep this morning.

Favorite book when you were a child:
As if I could pick one…well as we say in second grade, my "forever book" is The Good Night Book, by Lynn and Mandy Wells. "Hello pillow, hello bed. Here I come with my sleepy head."

Your top five authors:
As shallow* as this list looks, these are my favorites: L.M. Montgomery, Nora Roberts, Nicholas Sparks, Anna Quindlan, and Jodi Picoult.

*It's sort of like gourmet food: It's nice to have tried it and it's good for a nice meal every once in a while, but when you've had a crappy day, you just want some Chef Boyardee.

Book you've faked reading:
David Copperfield…thank goodness for SparkNotes. I passed the quiz (and got an A in Victorian Lit), but for the life of me I couldn't begin to give you the basic plotline today. I just know that I hated David.

Book you're an evangelist for:
Right now it's The Time Traveler's Wife by Audrey Niffenegger. I don't know how more people have not read this book. Maybe it's just my sheltered little corner of the world.

Book you've bought for the cover:
I have literally no idea.

Book that changed your life:
I don't think it can say that it changed my life, but my go-to standard is Anne of the Island. I think I could probably recite it by now, I've read it so many times.

Favorite line from a book:
"I don't want sunbursts and marble halls. I just want you." Anne to Gilbert, in Anne of the Island. (P.S. I am totally in love with Gilbert Blythe. Always have been, always will be.)

Book you most want to read again for the first time:
Jewels of the Sun by Nora Roberts. I want to ditch it all and run to Ireland and fall in love with a handsome bartender named Aidan too!

Adventures in Online Dating

2009-03-18T21:30:00.003-04:00

To make a long backstory short, I've tried just about every dating site there is, and while it works for some people (and even myself on occasion), it seems more to offer fodder for a good story than any sort of romantic possibility. Past emails from potential suitors included a 62-year-old who listed "cutting wood" as a hobby. Today's, though, brought new levels of unintentional comedy to my dating chronicles. This gentlemen, 11 years my senior, noted that while we don't seem to have very much in common, at least we live close by. He described himself as "not too slender" and pointed out that he doesn't watch sports because he can't sit still that long. Then he went on to say that he has all of his teeth and because he's not from here, we can't be related so we should really get together. I think that last part was supposed to be a joke, but from the profile picture, he really could've fooled me on the teeth thing.

You can't make this stuff up.

Dancing

2009-03-17T21:41:00.004-04:00

Is it just me, or does Dancing With the Stars make everyone want to be a ballroom dancer? Seriously. It's a good thing I live alone, because I make quite a picture dancing around my apartment. It's sort of like what Ginger Rogers would look like... if she disconnected her brain from the rest of her limbs.
Go Ty!!

Impressive

2009-03-15T19:11:00.003-04:00

Oh I am so supposed to be doing lesson plans and all that jazz, but I'll just take a moment to update...

Yesterday I opened up the wedding announcement page of the paper and found my ex-boyfriend's announcement...and was genuinely happy for him. Then I spent the whole day playing seventh wheel to my mom and dad and my sisters and their boyfriends.

All this with NO chocolate. Take that, universe.

Sorry, Julia.

2009-03-03T19:31:00.005-05:00

So yesterday I had a snow day...hooray for being able to sleep in and watch Steven and Chris, not hooray for the nice warm sunny days in June that I will now be spending in my classroom. I had planned to cook a chicken in my crockpot, because I've pretty well idiot-proofed that recipe and all it takes is getting up about 5 minutes earlier in the morning to molest the chicken (I'm sorry, but sticking my hand up the chicken's ass to take out its extra parts feels WRONG) and put it in the crockpot before work. Except...snow day. And sleeping in. And hanging out in my pajamas for a long time. So I forgot to put the chicken in the crockpot until it was much too late. So, emboldened by the aura of fake domesticity I get after watching Steven and Chris, I decided to roast the chicken. I have never done this before, but how hard can it be? I get my chicken ready, take out the little bag of innards, stuff it with some stuffing (more on that later), rub some butter on it and plop it in the oven.

A couple hours later, my chicken is done. It's nice and roast chicken colored and my thermometer has determined that it is sufficiently warm and no longer carrying disease. I take it out of the oven and it occurs to me that I have no inkling of how to carve the darn thing. Luckily my trusty Betty Crocker cookbook has a picture for idiots like me. Except that it is not carving as well as I would like.

Now I'm not sure of the exact moment or reason for this epiphany, but it suddenly occurs to me that I have roasted the damn chicken upside down. UPSIDE DOWN. Not that this has disastrous effects on the chicken, but what kind of a moron roasts the chicken upside down??

The same kind of moron who, failing to read the directions, assumes the dry stuffing will turn into a nice fluffy substance inside the chicken. Julia Child, I ain't.

Warped

2009-03-01T12:33:00.004-05:00

You know how they say there's a lid for every pot?

I think it's more like this...you're cleaning out the Tupperware cupboard, trying to match up all of the containers to their proper lids. You get mates for almost all of them, and then you're left with some perfectly good containers and...warped lids. They fit, but something is always just a little off.

Feeling like the last container in the cabinet today.

Redemption

2009-02-24T20:52:00.004-05:00

Lent is a very odd season. As a cradle Catholic, I think I've gone through all of the stages. Giving up iced tea, or sweets (because that's what my family did). Then there was the year that I didn't give anything up because I didn't see how not having a cookie with my lunch was going to bring me closer to God. I've sort of gone back and forth with the Lent thing. (Last year I gave up church, somewhat accidentally...I was sick for a couple of weeks and skipped another couple.)

This year, I am totally ready...and terribly unspiritual about the whole thing. The nice part about Lent is that it's sort of a do-over for your New Year's resolutions. It's perfectly situated just a couple of months after the initial 3-day "Yay, I'm awesome!" period turns into the "Yeah, that's not going to happen." It's like resolution redemption. So I'm very excited about Lent this year. I am giving up sweets again...mostly because I'm addicted to chocolate and starting to pack on the pounds. I am also resolving to exercise more...see pounds, packing on above.

And since Ash Wednesday is tomorrow, I'm hoping to be struck by something spiritual as well...and let it not be a bolt of lightning.

Domesticity

2009-02-19T17:18:00.004-05:00

I am not terribly domestic. I like my apartment to be neat and clean, I make phenomenally tasty chocolate chip cookies, and I can put a meal on the table when necessary, but I'm not exactly Martha Stewart. I like to use the excuse that since I live by myself and eat by myself, I'm not terribly motivated to be domestic. Put someone else in the picture and I turn into Donna Reed. Anyway...

As I have been home all day for the last two days (the relaxing/housework/schoolwork portion of my February break), I have been watching A LOT of daytime television. Seriously. A lot. And I have come to two conclusions. First, I should quit my job and watch talk shows and eat chocolate all day. (This was yesterday's project. Today was slightly more disciplined.) Second, if I were to watch daytime television all day, I would be the picture of domesticity.

Yesterday Steven (of Steven and Chris, my new favorite obsession) made fried ravioli. Now I'm thinking I should try making my own pasta instead of the two-minute Chef Boyardee routine. I'm thinking about slipcovers and sewing and scrapbooking. Nesting is so much more fun that correcting papers. I can tell you all about the best fabrics for pet-friendly design, stretches to wake your body up in the morning, and how to make classy mac and cheese (hint: it involves fettucine and lots of fancy Italian cheeses that I can't afford).

I'm going to quit my job and become a domestic goddess.

These two are the funniest people. I want them to move in next door.

Identity

2009-02-17T22:25:00.001-05:00

I’m trying on cat lady this week. Kitty-sitting for some friends of mine, which is not a terribly difficult task. Yesterday Kitty was loving and affectionate…right up to the point where I fed him. Then he was done with me. Today I had higher hopes, as he had been alone in the house all day. I think I may have spoiled that when I almost tripped over him in the darkness of the foyer. Kitty and I came to an understanding during a scintillating game of “Stalker Pounce on the Shoelace.”

I think I need a cat. I need more “Stalker Pounce on the Shoelace” in my life.